A very Biden and Bennifer holiday weekend
It's Gossip Time!
Hello and welcome to Gossip Time, a weekly guide to the stars by Allie Jones. What is even happening this week? I’m scared to find out.
In this house, we are waiting for two announcements this holiday weekend: One from the President of the United States, and one from the presidents of our hearts, Ben Affleck and Mrs. Jennifer Lynn Affleck. I have no idea what’s going to happen politically, but I do think that if Ben and Jen are going to announce their divorce before their two-year wedding anniversary on the 17th, they will do it this weekend. (Fun fact: My husband and I share their anniversary. We’re fine!)
People, the tabloid that will for sure get the divorce exclusive, reported this past weekend that Ben and Jen are “focused on their separate lives” right now and “don’t have any summer plans together.” YIPES.
Page Six, meanwhile, claims that Bennifer actually ended things back in March — right after J.Lo premiered her three-part multimedia ode to their relationship (the album, This Is Me…Now, the corresponding “musical film,” This Is Me…Now: A Love Story, and the Affleck-produced making-of documentary that in my opinion deserves an Oscar, The Greatest Love Story Never Told).
Ben is slow-walking the divorce announcement, Page Six speculates, because he is “very protective of Jennifer.” Aw.
But Ben and Jen are apparently so done that even Ben’s ex-wife Jennifer Garner is over it, according to the Daily Mail. Initially, she was encouraging Ben to work on the marriage, but now she has thrown up her hands.
“Jen eventually got to a place where she was like, ‘Sorry, figure this out yourself,’” a source told the tabloid. “It was beginning to become too painful for her because it was bringing back so many memories of their divorce.”
“Jen opened up her home and her life to J.Lo because she had moved on from the past,” the source, who I assume was Judy Greer talking a little too loudly at a restaurant, continued. “She cares about J.Lo and cares about their kids and how it will affect all of them. But in the end, it is not Jen’s circus, not Jen’s monkeys and she is done playing marriage counselor to her ex-husband and his wife.”
Right now, J.Lo is in New York City, wearing a crop top that says “JLO BE MY MAMA.” This is not a reference to any particular meme that I’m aware of.
Ben is still living in his $100,000-a-month rental in Brentwood and was photographed going to his office in L.A. several times in the last week. He and his buddy Matt Damon just sold their forthcoming thriller RIP to Netflix. RIP, indeed.
Whatever happens, we will regroup next week and get through it together. Hilary Duff for president!
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Further reading:
The Judy Greer line has me deceased
But whyyyyy why are they done. Like what happened?? How do you go from telling the greatest love story never told divorce?? I just want answers.